I am fully aware of my situation, of my “lot” in life and it neither bothers nor scares me but it does seem to terrify other people. My “It’s nice to dream about but I know I’ll never…” is almost always met with “Don’t say that! You never know!” but the thing is, I do know. I know my past and I can clearly see what the future most likely has in store for me and I don’t mind it at all, I accept it. I don’t mind that I will mostly likely never see Greece or France or any part of Europe, I don’t even get wistful.  Sure I like to look at photos and fantasize but I know I live a small, humble life and I’m fine with it. It’s really all I know.

Oh I can hear you now, “But you have to dream BIG!” But the term “Big” is all relative. Where I am situated “dreaming big” is dreaming of a bathtub that drains swiftly or a car that hasn’t had 17 other owners.  I do have dreams but they’re dreams that one has when one leads a simple life. They’re simple dreams and that is the way it is. I am ambitious but my ambitions are within my parameters. (or perimeters, I never remember)

I find that this attitude, this acquiescence scares the shit out of some people and some people actually get angry at me. I’d like to think it’s because they care for me to such a degree that they want me to “shoot for the stars” as it were. But there’s a very big part of me that just thinks that they’re terrified that they’ve been handed a line “If you can dream it, you can achieve it!” so EVERYONE must believe and DREAM BIG or no one can every achieve their dreams.  Sometimes I think some people are so unhappy, unsatisfied with what they’ve got in life the only way to make themselves “happy” is to keep dreaming. The only think I do know is; accepting with an open heart is relatively stress free.

Instead of toiling away under the illusion that I will make it to say, Santorini Greece or own a brand new car I’m appreciating what my modest life brings me; a car that transports me safely, a roof over my head, people who care about me, a full bottle of sriracha, a job that lets me create all day long.  Before you get up in arms I’m not saying that “Big Dreamers” do not appreciate what they’re given in life it’s just that sometimes when you live a small life the small gains mean more than you might think.

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