For those of you who don’t know me well; I live a very unconventional life. One thing that is unconventional is that I work evenings and that means as my kids arrive home from school and work I am heading out the door to my job. We’ve not sat down to a dinner together in ages.
I saw that! Many of your eyes twitched and you grabbed your heart! “Oh my! WE have dinner together every night! How else is one to keep the family together?! When do you sit down and discuss your day?!” Dude, people…parents have been working evening and night shifts forever and it has not crumbled the structure of The Family. Same goes for parents working on holidays and weekends. Not everyone in this society has a 9-5 m-f job. It’s possible to raise happy and healthy kids without sitting down to dinner each night. OK sorry, I got all uppity. Where was I?
Right, I’m not around when my kids eat dinner. This results in “Flatware Shrinkage”. I’ve lost more flatware over the past 18 years than most collage cafeterias. I don’t know where it goes. No, strike that, most of it goes in the trash and much of it lands between the sofa cushions because when you sit on the sofa to eat it’s just too far to walk to the kitchen to deposit the fork in the sink (It’s always forks. OK not always forks but it goes in cycles TODAY it’s forks) so we just shove it down the back of the sofa.
I currently have 3 forks that I try to guard with my life. If I am home when they are eating a snack or another meal I will grab the utensil from their little claws as soon as they’re done eating…ok maybe sooner than that…and I will wash it and put it away. *snort* OK let’s be honest. I may not wash it and put it away but I do put it in the sink and that’s where this story REALLY begins; one night ALL the forks were in the sink.
All the forks, and coincidentally all the spoons, cooking utensils, pots, pans and at least half of the plates were in the sink. In other words there was a sink full of dishes. Now you would THINK if one was going to eat say frozen waffles for dinner one would take the time to wash a fork, right? I mean you’ve gone through the trouble of removing the frozen waffles from the freezer, toasting them, putting them on a plate and “dressing’ them appropriately you’d think one would want to quickly rinse off a fork.
Not my kids. Nope. She used a lobster fork. To eat waffles. Do you know how long that must have taken?
And that’s a conundrum for me because do I scold her for her laziness? Sure she didn’t want to take the time to wash a fork but the perseverance one must posses to eat an Eggo with a lobster fork IS admirable as is the ingenuity one must have to even think of using a lobster fork.
I’m never sure if I’m raising exceptionally lazy humans or super geniuses. Either way it’s kind of scary.